It means no worries...

I feel like I’m back to square one with everything. family. friends. the guy I’m meant to be seeing. everything has just gone down hill in the last week or so. i feel like I’m falling back into the old me when i didn’t care about anything and ignored the whole world. that’s the last thing i wanted to happen and especially so soon when i was enjoying being the happy fun me i love. It’s just atm i feel like i want to drift away to some place where there is no drama. when i dont feel anything except calm and happy but i know that place is a world away from here.

why exactly did i think this could work the second time round. knowing that im the one who got screwed over by you and im the one putting in all the effort. yes i understand you have a life and have issues now and then but geez if you say you are going to see me then see me. kinda getting sick of being all happy cos i get to see you today then realising “yea his not coming :( ” then trying to get a hold of you but i get no responce. A hi would be nice. even if thats all i get. at least i know you read my txts -.- gahh i dont know how much more of this i can take. just when i think things are going back to normal then go right back down again and yea im not the one to blame. you are. so bloody fix this before you lose it all. cos im not waiting around forever. i have a life thats waiting for me. one where i dont care about a guy and i can go round having pointless fun. one where im not all happy one minute then all sad and dissapointed because someone doesnt show up. i can easily go back to that if i want to……but whats sad is that i want to be with you, even though i deal with this crap all the time, i still want to be with you.

thank you tumblr for letting me vent. you are my only friend who comforts and listens without actually doing anything so thank you :)
that doesnt mean i dont love that stuff from my other friends cos i do :)

Last night was my big night for firsts!
it was the first time i have actually been out to the city at night for a night out and not just some oh im bored lets roam around for a few hours doing nothing.AS
it was the first time i have tried dumplings. although they were chicken. but i think of it as a step towards more exciting ones :) cos i gots to say I LOVED THEM
AND THE CHOCOLATE ONES WERE ORGASMIC!!!
then to finish off the night of firsts i went to a live show and yes it was a comedy one. SAMMY J AND RANDY! i went in there not knowing who they were or what style their comedic acts are like so i would be able to experience them for the first time. only to realise that once they got on stage i was alll :O OMFG I KNOW THESE PEOPLE/PURPLE PUPET. thanks to foxtel i had seen some of their acts and loved them so right away i was full into it loving every moment of it.

this night for firsts couldnt have happened without the lovely andrea. who was my date for the evenings occasions ;) thanks for a GREAT night. love you :)